I am continuously inspired by women who are comfortable in their own skin or on a mission to get there. I therefore asked Sarah Darwen if she would share her story of self acceptance and her journey to living the life that she was ment to live. It's not a linear journey and one we all eb and flow on but Sarah's story hit me hard as it is spoken straight from her heart.
Meet the lovely, Sarah Darwen….
I have known Sarah for a few years now. She is one of those rare amazing souls that you get to belly laugh giggle with about the challeges of running your own business (there are many!) and something drew me to her straight away. It is rare to immediately feel someone is talking directly to you from their heart but Sarah is one of those truly authentic people. Sensitive, kind, wise and courageous, I am blessed to know her.
Before the story of her journey to where she is today, I asked Sarah what was her favourite flower and her answer was Antirynum. “The snapdragon, in folklore, they symbolise strength, protection, and graciousness under pressure, blooming in rocky places and often thriving where other flowers struggle. And … they are fiery, fiercely feminine, and full of character. They don’t just sit there looking pretty — they’ve got personality. Quirky, charming, with a bit of edge. They’re the ones in the flower bed with sass in their petals and don’t-mess-with-me magic in their stems. They’ve got that whole gentle but don’t mistake me for weak energy. That’ll do nicely!!!!" The perfect answer for Sarah.
Below is Sarah's story which we can all take note from. Sensitivity is a strength and our healing journeys never truly end.
Sarah's says….
"Still Here, Still Healing – My Journey to Halcyon
Hello! I’m Sarah. A proud Northumbrian now settled (finally) in Lancashire. I’m a women’s health therapist and corporate trainer with my own company, after a successful career in the public and third sectors. I’m healthy and happy now but it’s been one heck of a journey…
I’ve always been a sensitive soul. The sort of girl who felt things deeply, sat with them longer than she probably should, poured over the lyrics in the cassette cover, and carried a quiet ache in her chest even when everything looked fine on the outside. In my teens, that sensitivity was labelled anxiety. I suppose it was a start - a name for something I didn’t yet know how to carry.
Then came my twenties. A diagnosis of endometriosis. I went through the standard medical path - the scans, the pills, the hormones, and the distraction and dashed hopes. Until one day, sat in front of a consultant who said surgery was the next step, something in me just said no. I didn’t want more trauma carved into my body. I wanted something else, though I was told that there was nothing else. So I went searching.
The first thing I found was Reiki. Gentle, strange, beautiful Reiki. I loved it. The peace, the pause, the (re)connection. I took my Level 1 in 2003 just for me, but it cracked something open. Over time I added more; dipping my toes into the rich pools of Eastern and ancient healing practices. What started as self-care became something I could offer to others. Friends, family. Anyone who needed a bit of softness in a hard world that doesn’t always know how or where to meet us women. That’s when Halcyon (my company) was born - in 2008, over a bottle of wine in my sister’s shared house in Hackney. We scribbled names on napkins and came up with a vague plan. I don’t think either of us thought anything would come of it in that moment, but deep down I knew something was beginning.
At that time, I was working full-time in local government and in those awkward, ice-breaker, tell-us-something-we-don’t-know-about-you moments, I started to mention that I was a Level 2 Reiki healer. My colleagues started asking about it. And pretty soon I was booking meeting rooms over lunch and treating colleagues who were also struggling with their periods, stress, or anxiety. They’d pay me in sandwiches. Or a cheeky drink after work. But, after a heart-led conversations with my best-work-buddy in one of those post-office pub sessions, I decided to follow my soul and try it as a therapist. By the end of the month, I had a regular clinic slot in a local beauty salon. I kept Halcyon as my evening and weekend love until 2017, when I finally took the plunge and made it my full-time calling.
But none of this happened in a vacuum.
My twenties were also shaped by pain I didn’t ask for. I survived an abusive and violent relationship - moving to Lancashire for a new start. It wasn’t quite the positive future I was hoping for initially, though - I am also now a survivor of rape and sexual assault. I say those words not to shock, but to honour the version of me who kept going. Who didn’t give up, even when her body was in survival mode. Even when trauma tangled up her ability to focus, to believe in herself, to take up space.
There were years when self-doubt was louder than self-belief. Years when I couldn’t stick to plans or trust that anything good would last. And yet… I kept learning. Kept healing. Slowly, gently, stubbornly. And here I am. Still healing. Still here. Still struggling occasionally with those feelings and fears. Because healing isn’t linear - it’s long and messy. And learning isn’t a final journey either.
Now, I support other women on their own journeys - not because I have it all figured out, but because I get it. I know what it feels like to try and hold down a job while your body is screaming. I know how vital it is to feel seen, supported, and safe in a workplace. That’s why I do what I do now - bringing women’s health into boardrooms, into offices, into conversations. And I still offer 1-2-1 clinic sessions once a week in my new hometown.
After years of “failed relationships” - of wobbly boundaries, chronic ‘fixer’ syndrome and bad, bad relationship choices that I made out of fear and confusion, I have finally met my soul mate (we married 140 days after our first date - you know when you know, right!). I worked out exactly what I wanted, needed, and what I didn’t. I set boundaries. Real ones. I learned that you can be soft and fierce. And even though it’s all still tough some days, I’ve found a steadier ground beneath me.
Halcyon means peace. It’s a beautiful, mythical kind of calm that appears after the storm. And it mirrors the believe I had in 2008 and hold even stronger now - that no matter how stormy your waters are, they can be calm and tranquil again.
I suppose that’s what I’ve been building all along - for me, and for every woman who’s still trying to find her way back to herself. And at least now on my bad days, when I’m struggling with my business, or I’m not loving what is looking back at me in the mirror, I finally know that I’m home. And I am thankful for every twist and turn my journey has taken, because without them, I wouldn’t be the woman I am today. She’s not perfect. She’s not “there” yet. But she’s strong, quietly confident, compassionate and, at long last, at peace with herself and the World. She’s incredible in many ways. And I’m finally proud to say she’s me!"
If You Could Write a Letter to Your Younger Self Telling Her How To Be More Comfortable In Your Own Skin, What Would You Tell Her?
"Being comfortable in your own skin isn’t about having it all figured out. It’s about learning to trust your own timing. Letting go of the pressure to control everything. And returning, again and again as many times as you need to, to the quiet truths inside you. There are things in life you can shape and things you simply can’t. Some things will only shift when the timing, energy and space align so don’t be hard on yourself if something feels stuck. Sometimes, it’s just not the right moment - you’re simply not in alignment yet. What’s important is to focus on what is within reach.Soften your grip on what isn’t. And above all, learn to trust your intuition - she’s your compass, your anchor and she will always guide you home to yourself. You’ve already got all the answers you need to feel comfortable in your own skin- you just need to remember how to listen."
Sarah's Advice For Feeling Comfortable In Your Own Skin
“For me, it’s not a constant and it’s not about the visible - it’s about being in alignment - knowing and trusting yourself and your inner wisdom - knowing that things will happen when they can flow freely. It’s not about looking in the mirror every day and thinking “yes” - it’s not about never getting social anxiety or not feeling nervous or doubting yourself or your abilities. It’s being happy in the imperfections. Trusting that you're enough in all the ways that matter. Understanding why sometimes we get things wrong, why sometimes things feel wrong, and knowing ourselves and our needs well enough that we can listen to that inner wisdom that guides us.”
You can connect with Sarah here: www.halcyonwomenshealth.com
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